


In a Reality You Kill Me

by CarnivalofBrokenDolls (yourrhinestoneeyes)



Category: Metalocalypse
Genre: Character Death, Dark fic, Depressing, Drug Abuse, Gen, M/M, like really subtle, sort of shipping but it's really subtle
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-16
Updated: 2016-07-16
Packaged: 2018-07-24 11:18:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 903
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7506220
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yourrhinestoneeyes/pseuds/CarnivalofBrokenDolls
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>All bad things do eventually reach their end.</p>
            </blockquote>





	In a Reality You Kill Me

**Author's Note:**

> I saw a post online awhile ago that had a line saying something like "in a reality you kill me" and I was thinking about maybe an alternate reality where well this scenario takes place.

So this was how he was going to die?

This was oddly alright with him, what more did he expect though?

Not like he was going to die of old age, with a sweet wife by his side, and knowing he did good for the world around him.

Nah this was almost better than what he deserved. That’s really all Rockzo thought when he stared down at the handle of the knife, the blade was buried almost to the hilt into his gut. There was pain, it was dulled, because as usual he was so high that it left him delirious. There was a point where the drugs let something in his mind free, bye went Leonard and here comes the clown. The one with the razor sharp teeth and the predatory red eyes that haunted his every waking moment. That same clown was the reason there was a knife buried in him, it was his knife that just mere seconds ago he had planned on using on somebody he loved.

Oh right, he had other concerns. 

Now he could hear the crying and the muttering in a foreign tongue, the voice sounded more like it was coming from a frightened child instead of a grown man. Rockzo glanced up at Toki, he could just make him out, but it was hard; being able to see was difficult with the room fading so much like it was. 

God there was another sharp pain.

Before he knew it he was on the ground, Toki followed after. He could barely register the younger man’s arms wrapped around him trying to hold him up, to support him. He could smell the sweetness of the perfume he used despite the fact his band mates teased him for wearing perfume, he could feel warm tears against his neck and bare chest. 

This was entirely his own fault.

The clown had made Leonard do it, that’s how it had been since he was a teenager. That horrible demonic son of a bitch always made him do and say things that Leonard would never do in a million years. He’d worked so hard to keep it from really doing harm to Toki, his only friend in a long time.

He knew he couldn’t keep it that way forever and he had been right. Tonight he lost it, he did enough crocodile and heroin and cocaine that it should by all means fucking have killed him. Instead it made him black out repeatedly, it made him lose control of himself and let something else come out for its own version of having fun.

…..That was when it had happened, when he’d attacked Toki.

Leonard vaguely remembered the things he’d said to the kid, he vaguely remembered hitting him and knocking him around. He did remembering pulling his hunting knife from the inside of his boot and lunging at him. He had felt sick seeing this but not being able to do anything about it other than internally scream at himself to stop, why could he not make himself stop?

Honestly he was thankful for how strong, sober, and agile Toki was. In his panic and fear he’d managed to get the knife away from Rockzo and in that moment of panic well….

“It was an accident, I’m sorry, I’m sorry…..No please…..I-I’ll get….Please, stay awake.”

The pleading was in English again, in English in hopes that it would keep the older man alert and from closing his eyes. He felt Toki’s fingers in his hair, he felt his lips against his cheek. 

He wanted to laugh at this whole morbid fucking situation. He had tried to kill this guy and yet….

Yet here Toki was cradling him, begging him not to die, because if Rockzo died Toki wasn’t too sure he could handle it.

He’d be fine, Dory had been fine when he’d left her all those years ago. Toki would be fine with him dead, if anything his life would be better. Shit like this wouldn’t happen.

It was too bad that he was dying, it was too bad that the drugs in his system, the internal bleeding, and the fact he was so close to death that he could taste it on the tip of his tongue. He wanted to speak, but he knew if he opened his mouth blood would come pouring out and that would make Toki panic twice as much.

He felt lips against his forehead, this kid was too kind.

“Leonard please don’t die”

Leonard…..He had never in the four years they had been friends ever heard Toki call him by his real name, only by his stage name, the one the clown had suggested ages ago.

He wanted to wish Toki luck with life, tell him he loved him, and that he didn’t mean for any of this to happen. If he could he would have told him that way back a billion years ago there was a lanky blond haired Jewish boy named Leonard Rockstein who didn’t do cocaine and didn’t hurt a single living creature, Toki should have met that boy he really would have liked him a lot.

Leonard wasn’t scared of dying, not even the Hell that would come afterward if there were such a thing. Hell even dying in somebody’s arms was a pleasant feeling, he just hated leaving it with so much heartache and guilt.


End file.
